Saturday, March 25, 2006

"Bad Boys II" review


Bad Boys II (2003)

Directed by Michael Bay

Writing credits George Gallo Marianne Wibberley

Martin Lawrence .... Detective Marcus Burnett
Will Smith .... Detective Mike Lowrey
Jordi MollĂ  .... Hector Juan Carlos 'Johnny' Tapia
Gabrielle Union .... Syd
Peter Stormare .... Alexei
Theresa Randle .... Theresa

"Bad Boys II" is a throwback to the action movies of yesteryear. This is the kind of flick Schwarzenegger used to make with gleeful abandon. There was no regard for human life, no sense of living in reality and mass murder was hilarious. My God, this movie just didn't care one tiny bit. I loved it. "Bad Boys II" gives the critics the finger and hits a sledgehammer over the head of action movie fans for their blood and guts fix.

Every part of my soul is telling me that it's wrong to like a movie that promotes such anti-social values as laughing at decapitation. There was horror movie level gore in this flick but it was all done for laughs. Look! His skull popped open! AH-HAHAHAHA!! Stop! You're killing me! Bodies are meant to be mangled and blown up. And mangled they get.

So there was some story about drugs coming into Miami or some nonsense. That's not important. What is important is Smith and Lawrence destroying Miami as viciously as possible while cracking jokes about their chaos. Gabrielle Union shows up as Lawrence's sister and looks great in a bikini. That was a pleasant scene to help lighten up the carnage.

It's very important that you approach this madness knowing that nothing you see has anything to do with reality. If real cops acted this way, they'd be executed immediately. The name of this game is car chase carnage. If you like wild, violent car chases, you need to see this movie. That's what it excels at. I was very pleased. The movie is a bit too long but when your excessive length is due to excessive violence, I'm happy to stick around.

SCORE: 3.5 out of 4 for gleeful action excess

And for Gabrielle Union. You didn't think I was going to let this one get by without pictures of her now did you?

In the spirit of this fine film, here's some more over the top excess. I give you:

GABRIELLE!


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